What if taking the road less traveled meant following the path you least expected to?
The fork in the road wasn't supposed to be there, but you stumbled upon it anyway. You soon found yourself walking on the path you had no intention of following, be it good or bad. Sometimes, that is the only option. Once in a while, we may go where we do not want to, but where we are needed, or where we need to be.
For example, there are two people incredibly dear to me who have found themselves on paths they never expected to travel. One's change was due to something he couldn't necessarily control, and the other's was because of an unfortunate mistake. For both, the path ahead is fraught with challenge and perhaps a bit of heartache. When each of them told me how their lives changed direction, I ached with them; who could have foreseen the damage done by his internal battles, or the painfully necessary delay of her most treasured dream?
I love these people very much, and I know their courage and strength--they will turn out just fine. Still, I couldn't help but wonder why these things happen. Why does life have to be so awful sometimes? Of course I know the answer--it's part of living this life. Experiencing trial, heartache, misfortune, sin, disappointment, loss, pain. All of it. It is for our good and our betterment. Without these things, we could not know how exquisite joy can be. More importantly, however, feeling these "undesirable" things also helps remind us we are alive. There's a funny characteristic we humans have--the lower we fall, the higher we rise. Something about being downtrodden or seemingly defeated gets our blood pumping, and we strive to make things right again with all our might. We cannot grow stronger without opposition. Most often, making things right--getting stronger--involves taking the unexpected path, though there may be many twists, turns, and crossroads between now and that happy end.
Sometimes, this unexpected path materializes not because of mistake or misfortune, but because of active choice. President Thomas S. Monson coined an apt alliteration--"decisions determine destiny." Meaning, destinies can change. They often do.
Expectations are such fragile and naive things. My view on life up until recently was so formulaic; maintain a 4.0 GPA in high school, save money by working summers, go to college at BYU, major in Genetics, graduate in four years (probably get married at 21), jump straight into a doctorate degree, and then live "happily ever after" with my family and job. Everything I did--and I'm not joking about the everything part--was to bring me one step closer to the goals I'd set. I sprinted down this thin, straight path, all the way to BYU...
And oh my goodness. My road splintered into innumerable new and wondrous paths. I came to BYU expecting to receive a first-class education (which I have), but I did not anticipate that the greatest thing I would learn here so far is that the world--and life in general--is so much bigger and so much more than I could have ever imagined. I desire to experience everything this beautiful mortality God has given us has to offer. To meet people and hear their stories. To help them, if I can.
Amid all this, I've realized I no longer want to be a geneticist. There is much I could say to explain and justify this change of mind, but I won’t. What matters is that it no longer makes me happy, and I aim to find what does. For quite a while, I have felt guilty and unsure about this change. Am I a cop-out? Am I just not smart enough or determined enough to continue in this field? The answer is no. I know that whatever I choose, I will give my everything to. I am willing to make every sacrifice for it. Genetics just isn't that thing anymore.
You may ask, "what will you do instead?" Good question. I have no idea. Whatever I end up doing, though, I want to help people tell their stories--whether fictional or experienced first-hand. I hope to spread the truth and happiness they've learned, as well as my own. Now, this seems like a rather lofty ideal, but I am certain I can find a practical medium to achieve it through.
Ultimately, we decide who we are, what we do, and how we do it. God intended it to be this way; we have our agency. Why on earth should we not use this power to make ourselves and the world better? I know God trusts me to be wise and choose the better part. That's why He's left my future so wide open for me. It will be mine because I made it so. The path I've begun to take is one I never expected to, but it is right, and it is mine. One day, because of the love of God, my family, and my friends that spurred me on, I will be able to triumphantly say
"THIS IS THE HAPPINESS I CHOSE AND ACHIEVED ON MY OWN."
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